On two fatherly
lessons we could all take to heart.
Anyone who’s read
this blog for any length
of time is likely familiar with my AmericanStudier crush on W.E.B.
Du Bois, the lovey-dovey details of which I won’t repeat at length here. I’ve
even written about the specific focus of today’s post as part of two of those
prior posts: one dedicated to the benefits of reading and teaching Du
Bois’s letters; and one focused on his engagement with intimate
topics of family and parenting. But I think there’s still more to say about
Du Bois’s October
1914 letter to his 14 year old daughter Yolande, who had just embarked upon
an exciting and frightening educational adventure at England’s Bedales School. More exactly, two of the
pieces of advice that Du Bois gives to Yolande in that letter are, I would
argue, profoundly applicable to all of us.
One of Du Bois’s
principal purposes in the letter is (no doubt based on his own
youthful educational experiences abroad) to let Yolande know that she will
face prejudice, or at least surprised and frank examination, from those around
her based on physical differences associated with her race (such as her “dear
brown [skin] and the sweet crinkley hair”). Partly he reassures her by noting
that “most folk laugh at anything unusual, whether it is beautiful, fine or
not.” But on that last note, he also goes further: “You must know that brown is
as pretty as white or prettier and crinkley hair as straight even though it is
harder to comb.” Although he then moves on to emphasize that “the main thing is
the YOU beneath the clothes and skin,” I wouldn’t want that certainly more
important concept to elide the power of Du Bois’s argument, well before Langston Hughes’ “I, Too”
and even further before “Black
is beautiful,” for the beauty of particularly African American features. In
an era when communal
standards of beauty are still often set by unspoken racial and cultural norms,
we would all do well to read and remember Du Bois’s words here.
As anyone familiar
with Du Bois’ temperament would expect, he balance such positive and
complimentary advice with a healthy dose of tough love for Yolande. That’s
never more evident than in the last sentence of the third paragraph where,
having noted the amazing opportunity she has and how many “boys and girls all
over this world would give almost anything” to have it, he concludes, “You are
there by no desert or merit of yours, but only by lucky chance.” Since Yolande
was Du Bois’s daughter (and knowing the impressive life she
would go on to lead), I very much doubt that she did not possess such merit.
But nonetheless, Du Bois was entirely right about how much of a role luck plays
in presenting us with opportunities and possibilities, a fact with which American ideals of meritocracy
are consistently unwilling to engage. And he’s even more right in the next
sentence, which is the shortest in the letter and with which he opens his
longest paragraph of advice: “Deserve it, then.” We can’t account for luck, but we certainly
have a say in how we respond to it—something else we could definitely learn
from W.E.B. Du Bois.
Next
AmericanStudier love tomorrow,
Ben
PS. What do you
love about or in American history, culture, identity, community?
Dear Ben and fellow bloggers,
ReplyDeleteI've never been a parent, myself... and have a lot of respect for those who can take on that kind of responsibility and make it work. I think the hardest part of being a parent for me would be trying to answer my young children's questions about life, about others in their world, etc. in an inspiring and insightful way, and not a negative or hopeless way.
In Du Bois' letter to his 14 year old daughter Yolande, he says "most folk laugh at anything unusual, whether it is beautiful, fine or not."
That is so COOL! To be aware - like he was - of all the injustice and unfairness in the world, and be able to rise above it like that. Where does he get this stuff?
Definitely something to think about, to aspire to, etc.
Sincerely,
Roland A. Gibson, Jr.
IDIS Major